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Tips for avoiding a battle with your ex about the kids

On Behalf of | Mar 26, 2024 | Child Custody |

Children need a stable foundation to thrive. This is often difficult when their parents go through a divorce; however, parents who continue to work as a parenting team are often able to provide consistency for the kids. 

Even in the best of circumstances, there may still be issues that creep up between parents. It’s usually best to try to avoid engaging with your ex in these battles. Instead, trying to sort things out calmly is what’s likely best for the children. 

Set clear boundaries

Establishing and maintaining clear boundaries means defining acceptable topics of conversation, methods of communication and appropriate times for discussions. Boundaries help protect your emotional well-being and create a structured environment for communication, reducing the likelihood of conflicts. 

Focus on the child’s well-being

Keeping the focus on your child’s well-being can serve as a grounding principle during interactions. Before engaging in potential conflict, ask yourself whether the discussion benefits your child or if it’s driven by personal grievances. This perspective can help de-escalate tensions and shift the conversation toward constructive solutions that prioritize your child’s needs and interests.

Choose your battles

Not every disagreement needs to turn into a conflict. Sometimes, choosing to let go of minor issues can prevent unnecessary verbal battles and preserve a cooperative co-parenting relationship. Focusing on what truly matters can help you avoid getting caught up in unproductive arguments.

Take time to cool down

If you find yourself becoming too emotionally charged and at risk of engaging in a verbal battle, take a step back and allow yourself time to cool down. This might mean pausing the conversation and revisiting it later when both parties are more composed. 

The terms of the co-parenting relationship should be outlined clearly in the parenting plan. This should include terms for conflict resolution, so both parents know exactly how to handle contentious situations. 


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