When a child’s parents divorce, it is an incredibly stressful situation in the child’s life, just as it is in his or her parents’ lives. Not all divorces are amicable and even those that are can find ex-spouses unintentionally hurting their children. Here is a list of things children do not want their parents to do after they are divorced.
— Children should not be used as messengers. Parents, if you have something to say to the other parent, it is best to tell them yourself. This helps avoid any communication errors and your kids aren’t ready for adult conversations yet, anyway.
— Children do not want to be used as a spy. This can make a child very uncomfortable and it can violate the trust between the other parent and the child.
— Children don’t want to know about the money. While child support can be an important topic between divorced parents, the children do not need to hear about the arrangements that were made. If you have questions, put it in an email or pick up the phone.
— Children don’t to hear their parents putting each other down. It wasn’t right or acceptable when you were married and it’s not okay after you divorce. Children love their parents and they don’t want to hear insulting things about either one of them.
— Children don’t want to see new love interests. Children think public displays of affection are generally gross, anyway. Avoid this type of behavior in front of your children, who may secretly be hoping for a reunion between mom and dad.
Child custody situations can become heated and it doesn’t just happen in court during a divorce. After a divorce, it may be tempting to do any of the above, but it’s better to put the feelings of your children first. If you need to revisit the issue of child custody, your divorce attorney can help.
Source: Huffington Post, “10 Things Kids Of Divorce Do Not Want Parents To Do,” Marni Feuerman, Aug. 10, 2016
