Most parents who share custody of their children want as much parenting time as possible. They may try to secure a 50/50 split to ensure they see their children regularly. Unfortunately, parents don’t always consistently show up for their children the way they should.
Especially after finalizing a divorce, some parents may withdraw from their relationships with their children. They may start canceling their parenting time for questionable reasons or might regularly show up late or bring the children back early. Such deviations from the parenting arrangements can be highly inconvenient for the other adult in the family. They can also prove destabilizing for the children.
How can a parent dealing with a no-show co-parent address the issue?
By creating clear records
To take effective action, a parent needs proof that there has been a consistent issue with reliability. Keeping physical notes in a journal or communicating via a parenting app every time the other adult cancels or shortens their parenting time can help document what has happened. The clearer the pattern is, the easier it can be to take action and resolve the issue.
By discussing the matter
Sometimes, co-parents are so focused on their own convenience and lifestyle that they don’t think about how their actions might affect their children. Some co-parents are open to communication and may adjust their behavior when other people show them the patterns in their behavior. If the discussion only leads to excuses or arguments, then it may be necessary to look into legal solutions for the issue.
By modifying the custody order
Canceled and shortened parenting sessions cause a number of negative consequences. They can make the children in the family feel rejected. They can also be incredibly inconvenient for the other parent in the family.
The parent who doesn’t cancel or reduce their parenting time may end up scrambling for childcare or canceling their own plans. Going back to court to request a custody modification can resolve the issue.
By reducing a parent’s time to reflect how often they actually see the children, the other parents can make the household schedule more predictable. The courts may recognize the emotional turmoil that regular cancellations can cause for children. As with any custody matter, modification hearings require a focus on the best interests of the children.
When one parent doesn’t show up for their kids, that can influence what a judge believes is in the children’s best interests. The adjustment of the custody order can lead to a more stable parenting schedule and less turmoil for the children.
Being proactive about documenting and resolving child custody issues can help parents do what is best for their children. Those who modify their custody orders can limit the rejection and disappointment their children feel when a co-parent doesn’t show up for their parenting time.
