Shared custody or co-parenting has become the gold standard in most modern divorces. The family courts like to see both parents working together for the benefit of the children in the family. As a result, typically, parents need to communicate with one another about their children in the wake of a split. They need to make decisions together about major child-rearing matters, like what schools the children attend. They also have to abide by the custody order regarding how they divide parenting time unless they go back to court to modify the order.
Occasionally, those trying to co-parent reach the conclusion that the other parent does not want to cooperate. In fact, they may lose out on time with their children that they should have because the other parent cancels parenting sessions or otherwise violates the custody order.
How can one parent handle attempts by the other to interfere in their relationship with their children?
By keeping careful records
Many family law disputes turn into he-said, she-said situations. Neither parent has verifiable evidence, which leaves judges in a difficult position. Someone hoping to modify or enforce a custody order due to the other’s non-compliance needs proof of what has transpired. Keeping detailed records of every canceled and shortened parenting session can help establish that one parent does not consistently follow the custody order.
By asking for specific adjustments
When a parent does not consistently follow the custody order, a judge may agree to modify the division of parenting time or decision-making authority based on the current conduct of both parents. A judge could order makeup parenting time in some cases. They could also increase the parenting time of an adult the previously denied access to their children.
Diminishing the time and control of a parent who has ignored or violated a custody order is also a reasonable response by a family law judge. So long as the judge hearing the case agrees that alterations could be beneficial for the children in the family, they might approve a modification request in response to a history of interference by one parent. They can also declare the other parents in contempt as a way to force them to better comply with the existing custody order going forward. Going to court to enforce or modify a custody order can help a parent protect their most important relationships.
Requesting additional parenting time or makeup parenting time could be reasonable reactions to prior attempts to diminish time with one’s children. Parents who document and assertively respond to attempts at alienation can protect their parental rights in a contentious custody scenario.
