If you married someone who is living with Asperger’s syndrome, you may now have reached a point where their actions or unique challenges no longer align with your goals in your marriage. Although Asperger’s syndrome is considered to be a high-functioning form of autism, there are some differences in how people with this condition process their lives compared to people who do not have it.
As a spouse who doesn’t have this condition, understanding it and how it affects your spouse may help you as you approach the idea of a divorce. There are some basic differences that you should be aware of and prepare for.
Emotions are different in a divorce with Asperger’s
The first thing to remember is that your emotions may be processed differently than your spouse’s. They may have a harder time displaying their emotions or understanding yours. This may lead to frustration, so do your best to leave your emotions out of the divorce while negotiating your settlement. Look at the divorce as a business arrangement, and consider speaking with a therapist or loved one about your personal feelings.
Scheduling may be a focus
Something that may help you during your divorce is understanding that your spouse likely has a preference for rigid schedules and routines. If you plan to have meetings, see if you can set them for the same time each week or at times when you know you can be present. If you have to change a meeting at the last minute, be prepared that they may not adapt to that change or be willing to move forward with a discussion.
Your concerns may not be theirs
Finally, remember that your concerns may not be the same as your spouse’s. While you may be emotional about your relationship ending, they may be more rigid and concerned about preserving an income or assets. This is nothing more than a difference in how each of you approaches a life-changing situation, so try to be considerate of your spouse’s opinions while making sure that you are heard.
Getting support with this kind of divorce is helpful for many couples. With the right legal knowledge and guidance, it’s possible to get through the divorce and to move on with your life.